Fighting versus Feeling

To many world leaders are continually fighting, blaming that the other country is wrong, even dangerous. But yet take no responsibility for their own actions in the fight.

These world leaders are often men, pursuing their perceptions of power without acknowledging presence.

So many men learn these beliefs from such a young age, to the degree where anger is seen as masculine, yet feeling is seen as feminine.

I have spent the last few years learning about the power of feeling and emotional sharing that can rise from the depths of vulnerability. I have always carried a belief that it is a sign of weakness to be emotional, even vulnerable. And within this belief carries a connection towards expressing anger as a masculine way to behave.

For many men, it is confusing as they do not understand that vulnerability is a courageous way of being. To feel deeply into oneself and sit with the emotional movements that may exist within. For many men, we learn to sit in silence attempting to manage our inner emotional turbulence.

Many moments of time suppressed with coping strategies often avoiding our feelings but seduced by the explosive patterns of anger. An inner battle that consumes both the self and all those around them. A ticking time bomb with a short fuse, that has lost the right to choose when the flame is lit igniting the explosive anger within. 

There is a myth of being a man, where standing strong surviving is more masculine than falling into open surrender. Talking is often taken to thinking alone, rejecting support to witness the emotions that lie within. 

But to feel, instead of fight is the darkness trusting the light, arriving from the depths below. Man does not need to tame his shame, it is part of his life. Fighting is the fear to feel, to witness the pain within. 

We are taught to avoid, not feel. For anger is strength, it is the power of a man. To fight for what is right even if this right is wrong. It is more masculine to stand tall and not fall to forgive the love within. 

To feel the fight that exists within is the only true pathway where love can begin. It is the presence of expansion without an angry reaction. To no longer be at war, keeping the score where rights fixes wrong.
Where years of memories that have lost their song.
In the belief they are right but really they are wrong.
To surrender to their pain and reframe their gain.
No longer attempting to tame their shame.

To feel before fighting, is no longer igniting the flames of the storm within. 
To feel before fighting, is the way of the soul, to reunite his wealth together as whole.
To feel before fighting, is the way he can be, to allow all his pain and learn how to be.
To feel before fighting, is the gift for himself, emotional, physical, psychological health. 
To feel before fighting, is learning within, because the love that he needs is deep inside him.

For world leaders who fight sharing anger in war.
Please remember there are men who stand at your door.
Not protecting or serving the war that you fight. 
But they welcome your feelings that lie deep within

For, it is here you will meet your true masculine.    

© Pete Bengry 2026

Credit to Sander Sammy for image